- It is my prayer, that the readers of this blog are blessed, inspired, and motivated.
Psalms 91:14 says “Because he hath set his love upon me, therefore will I deliver him: I will set him on high, because he hath known my name”
On January 8, 2017, I accepted the calling God has placed on my life. I call this my purpose. I was unsure as to what that calling actually was going to be, but I know I was tired of running. I was tired of being tired. I’m 30 years old, grew up in church, I’m a wife, and a mother of 2 little boys. Before January, this is how I defined myself. I have always had a servant heart. Back in August of 2016, I thought I had it all figured out. I was working as a Case Manager, (this is not a job that you will make a lot of money doing), serving others. This job can be mentally, physically demanding, but I loved what I was doing.
Through the years, I lost my sense of self worth, and began to feel used. Sometimes giving your all to something has a way of mentally and physically draining you. My job was taking up 55% of my time, my kids 45% and the other 10% left I gave to my husband. Leaving nothing for myself. I was attending a conference in July of 2016, and my world was turned upside down. I learned that my job, as I knew it, was going away. At the time, I thought that was my purpose in life, to help those who could not help themselves. When you think you have everything figured out, God has a way of showing you that he is the only person in control. After this day, it seemed like everything started going down hill. The enemy started attacking me from every direction!
First, he started on my finances. Suddenly job security was my main focus. I started saving more than I spent. I was applying for jobs like crazy, even went on a few interviews. Then he worked on my health. I kept feeling a lump in my throat which I had to go to the doctor several times and even an ENT specialist and no one could tell me what was wrong. I was experiencing bad headaches and toothaches which led to me getting my wisdom teeth extracted (which was also an unexpected expensive procedure). Then lastly, my sanity was being attacked! This cloud of negativity was around me. Everyone I talked to had nothing positive to say. This dampened my spirit, made me feel depressed and alone. Nothing was going right.
I had to travel a lot through my job. This caused me to meet a lot of new people. I knew something was extremely wrong when my customers, whom I checked on monthly, started noticing a change in me. I found myself bursting out crying in random customers homes. I was so unhappy. And every time I got in my car Kirk Franklin’s song was on the radio and all I would hear is “Do you want to be happy?” And this would be followed by Detrick Haddon’s song “Running from your Calling!” It was so obvious that God was trying to tell me something! I later found out this was called conviction!
I finally gave up and did something I hadn’t done in a while, and that was get on my knees and start praying! And I got this strong sense to quit my job! I fought this feeling for so long, but something deep inside me kept saying do it. I was given confirmation on 3 different occasions (in the same day) by 3 different people that do not know each other. Three of my guardians that I met with monthly all told me that God had a plan for my life and wanted me to do what I needed to do and he was going to work it out. So I did it, I gave my 2 weeks notice and my last day was supposed to be Dec 1st.
I dragged that 2 weeks out and 2 weeks turned into a month, then finally I had to say no more. So January 13th was officially my last day. On January 8th, I attended church for the first time in months. And Pastor Sweat preached on “Restoration”! All I heard from that message was God was ready to restore my soul. It seemed like I floated up to the alter after the message and that was it. I gave it all up. Put my full trust in him. Left all my troubles, worries, and frustrations right there on that alter! Let me just tell you, I felt so much lighter! This was not the first time I have given my life to Christ, for real! To top things off, I received a call the next day for an interview that I applied for back in October and was offered the job!
That next week, my Husband who has been my confidante through all of this started going through. (I plan to do a video blog with him and he can tell you his own testimony). But let me just tell you, God placed the conviction on him and a few weeks later, he went up to that same alter and gave it all up as well!
Everything has been falling into place and God has shown us favor. I’m so thankful. I owe him the highest praise. But he has given me a purpose in life, and that is the reason for this blog. I am his messenger.